What experiences in life helped you grow the most?
In my younger days, failure always seemed like a source of shame, and it would make me avoid the things I wasn’t very good at.
The first real challenge was learning to drive. I was afraid of trying to move this huge lump of metal across junctions and roundabouts with a real chance of a collision with another lump of metal. I had 4 different driving instructors. All in different parts of the country.
The first was in Bradford, a friend of my mother’s. He had zero patience for my many mistakes – he would shout at me – needless to say, not many of his students passed. I was training to be a teacher at the time. I learnt how to teach without shouting or humiliation. I didn’t do my test in Bradford because I managed to get a job in the Midlands.
I was picked from my school, and I drove down quiet country lanes. The lessons were peaceful, no raised voices, and very few hazards. My instructor was patient, kind, and willing to explain why a manouve was unsuccessful. She helped to build my confidence through self belief. Again, I did not put my learning to the test as I moved again this time to London.
I couldn’t find a harder place to learn, congestion, impatience, and verbal abuse. I failed my test three times. I blame the huge roundabouts on the South Circular. There were times when I would cancel the lessons because I couldn’t face pulling out when the traffic was moving so fast.
The desire for independence became more powerful than my fear. I pushed through the pain and eventually passed my test. I still have a sense of dread at those roundabouts, but nothing beats freedom.
I have faced many failures since then, but now I’m prepared to try.
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